Hasta la Byebye

Om nom nom

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

We ain't even been to the ocean

So.

So it would appear that I'm going to remain in my Race Policy class and take it pass/fail. This seems the best of several unsavory options. The most unfortunate consequence will be my poor participation in what should be a two-person effort to describe a book's purpose both orally and in writing. Updates might be forthcoming.

I will depart for Newark in 41 hours. Once I arrive I will depart for Manchester. At that point I hope to be picked up by Danielle. I will then spend much of my six days in the Shire reading.

Late in high school or early in college I started viewing myself metaphorically as some sort of large aircraft--usually a World War II bomber--trying to fly home. In the beginning of a semester everything would appear all right and everything would be running with a fine hum. But then there would be a hiccup, and the thin veneer of quality would be largely stripped away, baring damage from untold missions past. Faulty wiring, poor insulation, makeshift workarounds everywhere, but I could still fly.

No machine runs perfectly, however, and the longer I flew the less sound I became. Pieces of me would fall away repeatedly in an exaggerated parallel to how I seemed to be faring. Never enough to make me crash, and the pieces would often magically reappear a day later to fall away again in an identical fashion. My crew was desperately trying to stabilize me. We'd be almost home.

Once the majority of my work for the semester would complete I would let the bomber metaphor rest. I would just stop thinking about landing, and be relieved that everything was almost over; I would never even think to see myself flying home. It just ends. There was no success, but simply a lack of failure. My crew would repair me while I rested, but there's only so much they can do when they're still stuck in the air.

I could use a real vacation in the Shire. But perhaps we can patch a few holes, reconnect some wires, make sure the second engine doesn't fall off again.

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Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Joe DiMaggio never left

But Cantay is tired.

I'm going to New Hampshire in nine days and I'm excited but I'm tired and and I don't want to suffer. Plus, every time I'm near Danielle and fatigued I immediately fall asleep, which is cool I suppose because I'm really fucking comfortable when I do that, but I didn't want to visit Danielle just so I could be in a state where drooling is at least partially acceptable. I've got a tremendous amount of work to do upon my return, but I'm seriously considering slathering it all in whipped cream and feeding it to Jagger, our garbage disposal.

Fucking ass-pirates.


For extra fun, try replacing the italicized phrases with your own! Like so:

But Cantay is really hot.

I'm going to New Mexico in nine days and I'm excited but I'm upset at the prospect of not seeing Cantay's sweet, sexy, sharp-angled ass for weeks or possibly months. I also have a raging case of the crabs and and I don't want to let it get worse by avoiding the doctor again. Plus, every time I'm near a tour guide and fatigued I tend to get totally plastered, which is cool I suppose because I'm really fucking horny when I do that, but I didn't want to visit the great state of Bill Richardson just so I could be in a state where drooling is at least partially acceptable. I've got a tremendous amount of work to do upon my return, but at least I don't have as much as Cantay.

Fucking those tour guides will be entirely worth it.

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Monday, March 17, 2008

This is the story of Cantay

It's completely unrelated to the story, but I would like to say that, having listened only to Aldhils Arboretum thus far, I feel confident declaring Of Montreal to be revolutionary, transcendent and sexy. It's all about music & lyrics & repetition & harmony (even if I'm tone-deaf), all skillfully woven into a lovely knit-sweater that I'd wear to a dinner at a nice restaurant.

But getting to the promised story, I'm sad to say that I was right again about Spring Break: one week sucks almost as much as nothing; I need at least 2.5 of those weeks to get sufficient recovery. Perhaps because of all the stress that I haven't had sufficient opportunity to relieve I'm suffering from insomnia coupled with my usual crippling compulsion to avoid homework.

I have become so tired of this same old routine, where the progressing school year sees me fall apart physically, emotionally and scholastically to the point where reaching the finish line is an accomplishment. How the hell am I supposed to handle graduate school? And how am I supposed to impart the workings of my brain on the young if I can't handle graduate school? Gah! Gah and fuck!

The onslaught of work that faces me is just so daunting that I think I'm going to take advantage of the counseling people that our dear University of Texas offers. I tried something similar at GW, but I've become desperate once again, and I have reason to believe that the general streak of competence that UT has displayed in relation to GW would extend here. Besides, even if I'm wrong, it doesn't fucking cost me $50 to try.

Of course, as some of you may know, Danielle is also coming Tuesday to visit me during her Spring Break, so I'm not entirely sure how the counseling thing will swing. It may or may not happen, but Christ if I'm not tempted to just forgo any further attempts at sleeping so I can show up when the center opens at 8:00. Ah, but how it will be good to see Danielle again. Insallah her presence will be therapeutic enough to leave me no need to bother with others, but I'm not keen on burdening her too much with this--she'll get more than enough of it because she's a good girlfriend even if I'm not forthcoming so I'd rather not pour it on.

But wait!

I know this entry has been reasonably depressing for all of you out there so far, but I have intentionally left back some very good news so that those who don't already know it might feel an upswing in their moods. While in a Vicodin-induced demi-haze that I put myself in due to the extraction of my wisdom teeth the day before, I played in a $40 tournament and breezed swiftly to victory once the field had narrowed to one lucky but talentless fellow and myself, collecting a $1,200 purse that became my new record cash. Three minutes after that tournament completed I entered a $100 tournament and won $2,200 in second place, shattering my hours-old record after a much more embarrassing heads-up defeat. It was very exciting. Sadly, though I played several more tournaments before leaving K-Town, I didn't cash in any of them.

But then when I came back to Austin on Saturday, without Vicodin, I entered a $100 tournament as soon as I set up my laptop. I was on the ropes most of the way and it didn't really seem things were going well, so naturally I went ahead and entered a separate $100 tournament to focus on after I died in the present one. As it were, however, Fortune favored me that day, and I rebounded to become one of the two tournament chip-leaders. At the final table I wove through to heads-up play against a player who played far too timidly but also got quite lucky. After half an hour of fighting I finally was able to crush him and claim $3,000. Hurray! Meanwhile, in that second tournament that I'd entered (and to that point largely neglected), I managed to make another final table and cling to enough chips to survive until 5th place, taking down $960 to pad my rolls.

This still doesn't mean Christmas presents for any of you, but damn does it feel good to get multiple large wins. My confidence in my poker-playing ability has never been higher. ^.^

And yes, this does probably make the whole school thing harder, since the irrational corners of my mind keep screaming, "You don't need this schtick. Become a professional!"

Yeah, counseling might be a good idea.

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Saturday, February 10, 2007

Continuing the Trend...

Of mentioning music that Eric mentions, Danielle sent me Wincing the Night Away, among other things, and it has just now arrived. I've also just now started listening to it, and because it's usually not best to say much an album before you've listened to it all, I'll hold my commentary back. But The Shins turn me on; oh, they turn me on so hard. You know who else turns me on so hard? Danielle. Thank you, Danielle; I'd jump you wherever you currently are but for the intervening miles.

The unfortunate side-effect of receiving The Shins, however, is slicing your middle finger on the scissors you're using to open the package. It's not a bad cut, but bad enough to require a jury-rigged bandage which makes typing an absolute chore.

My family is supposed to be coming up today to visit me and our family friends in Austin. They were supposed to call when they left and they were supposed to arrive in the late afternoon. No telephone call yet. Bah.

I feel good though. And despite all the usual senses of angst that hang around Valentine's Day, I think this one will go rather smoothly. Now to vegetate and listen to my perhaps-favorite band.

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