I am gonna make it through this year, if it kills me

That's right. For those who know what the title means, you're anticipating the follow sentence, which I dedicate to those who don't know: I am now the proud owner of my first The Mountain Goats album. Specifically, The Sunset Tree. I also own two The New Pornographers albums. Thank you, Googlezon, for providing this opportunity. Both acquisitions were really long overdue.

You know what else is long overdue?--Well, no. Better: You know what I'm supposed to be working on but am not so that I may blog? No? My economics project! Yes! Also, I was supposed to get The Flaming Lips and Of Montreal before anything else, but Amazon didn't put their stuff on sale.

Don't worry, I won't go on now to bore you with details about my project. I'm much too tired and short on details to do that. Let's just say I'm losing my mind.

And for some unknown reason, I keep thinking of the fragment of a line by the little boy in Angels in the Outfield: "God, if there is a God, [please let the Angels win]." I can't remember exactly what he says, but I'm tempted to offer up such an agnostic's prayer for some undefined desire that I have. Maybe, "God, if there is a God, please deliver me from this work." But I don't think that God, if there is a God, would approve of little men shirking their duties for the sake of avoiding a little pain. I wouldn't really either, but I'm hardly in any condition to plow through. I need to do a better job of taking care of myself and my studies throughout the semester to prevent this sort of predictable, finishing collapse. Every time I drive the battered old van that represents me past the finish line, sometimes with more dents and broken windows and missing doors and leaking carburetors and conflagrant engines than otherwise, but always through. This fact is at once heartening and disspiriting, and I don't know which feeling predominates right now.

Also, I haven't eaten dinner yet. This is because today's cooperative meal was apparently so good that everyone ate all of it before I could get down forty minutes after dinner started. Fuck yes. Now I get to order pizza!

God, if there is a God, please knock some sense back into me. But don't send Eric.