My, I'm feeling cheery! Not only has my hormone-level (as far as I can detect it) gone down, but I'm also the World Ping Pong Mastah. That's right bitch. Say it. "Mass. Tah." Ain't it w00tful?
John, Eric and I went down to Best Buy after school--which for the three of us ended at about 12:25. Before we did that, we went ahead and paid a visit to Kinko's where I learned that Beth is totally going to be a writer! I envy that slut; apparently she has skill with a pen or something.
At Best Buy I took a look at the computer games that those fellows had in stock, and, much to my chagrin could find nothing that I really wanted at all. However, after some searching in the bargain aisle, I found this relatively new Star Wars Starfighter game thing, so I bought that for $2. Literally $2--I was quite happy, even if I had to use a $5 off coupon to get it to that price... especially since said coupon is only supposed to be valid for software and accessories worth twenty-five dollars or more, and I have one more that needs a home. I also decided to make a venture into classic music. It's something that I've been trying to do more lately; so far I've picked up stuff from The Beatles, Led Zeppelin, and David Bowie, and today I decided that it would be Rolling Stones Day. So I yoinked Forty Licks off the shelves and shelled out the $25 required to purchase it and take it home with me (used my old birthday giftcards which I -finally- remembered to stuff into my wallet).
On a pretty unrelated note, I've been very happy to also use up a very old Barnes and Noble giftcard I got about fifteen years ago. I feared that if I waited any longer, they might deduct from the $30 my benefactors put on it like they threatened to do on the back of the card. How did I spend it? Yesterday I went on to bn.com, and after about an hour, I was able to find a suitable Bible and Qur'an that combined were $27.54 (and came with free shipping since the order totaled more than $25--w00t!). I figure I can use these old holy books to do some study into religion and make myself better informed about what exactly all these fellows are thinking with their extremism and stuff. Who knows? I just might convert myself to some religion. ::Chuckle::
So anyways, after Best Buy, John and me were about on the verge of dying, and we were planning to just head on home until Eric encouraged us to try some ping pong at his place. Deciding that we could use the adrenaline boost, we accepted, and soon enough we were at Chez Eric. I will now recount the history of the nation of Pingpong, wrought with brutal civil wars and devious coups.
The nation was effectively formed when Cantay of Turk united the wandering and confused peoples of the region together under one banner and established trade routes and cultural links to the outside world. Over the next five centuries, the First Cantay Dynasty ruled Pingpong and the country flourished. However, a jealous general named Cody (Eric's brother) soon hatched a ploy to take power away from the Cantays by turning the army against him. After much vicious fighting within the royal palace, Cody's followers were able to claim the reigns of Pingpong from the recently decapitated King Cantay XVII.
Cody was unable to keep power for more than two centuries, though, falling quickly to an assault of the Eric Tribe after barely fending off the savage Johns. The leader of the Erics was then unable to maintain strength and unity in the kingdom, and Blondie III abdicated his throne to the cheers of millions who were demanding that the deposed Cantays be allowed to return to power. Cantay I of the Second (often referred to as the "Glorious") Cantay Dynasty (the numbers start over with each dynasty) instituted countless reforms throughout his kingdom, though many of them were created to help keep him and his descendants maintain power and were in reality quite oppressive. Of course, his tactics served to keep the family in control of Pingpong for seven hundred years--until Erics, promising freedom and love, forced themselves into power by convincing Cantay XXII that living at the family estate in Couch would be a much finer thing to do than to rule over a country. Cantay XXII, you see, was mentally retarded (hurrah for inbreeding!) and so it actually didn't take much convincing for this to happen--Cantay;s family even paid the Erics a monthly sum for their services.
After only two monarchs from the Erics succeeded to the throne, the people of Pingpong realized that these guys were at least as brutal as the Cantays before them, while not having the added advantage of being able to scare foreign leaders with a toothy grin. A civil war that broke out after the death of Erico II lasted only three weeks, and Cantay supporters quickly installed the best candidate into the position. Oddly enough, this fellow--the closest living and willing male relative of Cantay XXII's--was at best a fourth cousin to Cantayana, the matriarch of the family, and so the quality of service was mediocre as far as Cantays go. In fact, the Cantays were nearly destroyed two centuries after they began the Third Cantay Dynasty by Cantay V, who ate all of his children, then his wife, then his parents, then his cousins, and then anyone else that he could find of his family. The belief was that by eating everyone, he would grow stronger. In actuality it may have worked, since Cantay V lived to be 84 years old and reigned for 47 of them.
Into the vacuum the pesky Erics leaped and claimed power for three generations before Cantos the Young practically came out of no where to challenge Eric III for the throne. After about ten coups attempts and ten attempted rebuttal assassinations, Cantos finally came to power during the confusion caused when Eric III was strangled to death by his four year old son, who then proceeded to explode. Cantos, realizing the problems to the people posed by the Second and Third Cantay Dynasties, eased the restrictions that his forefathers had placed to protect him, and quickly became known as Cantos the W00t. He and his progeny expanded Pingpong and brought prosperity to the people over the next five hundred years, until tragedy struck the House of Cantay to end the Fourth (often termed "Most Glorious") Cantay Dynasty.
A large comet struck the royal palace of Pingpong, utterly slaughtering its inhabitants, and fulfilling the prediction made by the Erician seer Harpoo that "They will die! All of them!" which she made just before stabbing herself in the eye. Because she was so completely right, the Erics were allowed to snatch power, which they held for three centuries, establishing the first real non-Cantay dynasty, known as the Dynasty of Erics. However, it didn't last much beyond the reign of Shazhopper II, who accidently cut off the "DO NOT REMOVE UNDER PENALTY OF LAW" tag from his mattress, and was executed. The Fifth, and current Cantay Dynasty has been in power for three hundred years and shows no signs of letting up any time soon. Yay!
So... what does all this mean? It means I had winning streaks of 5, then 7, then 2, then 5, then 3 in ping pong at Eric's today. That may not sound extremely impressive, but take into account that after about ten games the body starts to get very angry. For those of you who weren't there, my overall record was 22-6, and only once did I suffer consecutive losses (see the only Eric Dynasty, where I lost the throne to Eric, then John lost, then I lost again). Individual records (estimated in the win-columns) are 2-1 against Cody, 6-0 against John, and 14-5 against Eric (as you may notice, John and Cody did lots of sitting out).
Anyways, now that I've driven you from this place forever, I would like to wish you a good night. Hasta la byebye, folk.
John, Eric and I went down to Best Buy after school--which for the three of us ended at about 12:25. Before we did that, we went ahead and paid a visit to Kinko's where I learned that Beth is totally going to be a writer! I envy that slut; apparently she has skill with a pen or something.
At Best Buy I took a look at the computer games that those fellows had in stock, and, much to my chagrin could find nothing that I really wanted at all. However, after some searching in the bargain aisle, I found this relatively new Star Wars Starfighter game thing, so I bought that for $2. Literally $2--I was quite happy, even if I had to use a $5 off coupon to get it to that price... especially since said coupon is only supposed to be valid for software and accessories worth twenty-five dollars or more, and I have one more that needs a home. I also decided to make a venture into classic music. It's something that I've been trying to do more lately; so far I've picked up stuff from The Beatles, Led Zeppelin, and David Bowie, and today I decided that it would be Rolling Stones Day. So I yoinked Forty Licks off the shelves and shelled out the $25 required to purchase it and take it home with me (used my old birthday giftcards which I -finally- remembered to stuff into my wallet).
On a pretty unrelated note, I've been very happy to also use up a very old Barnes and Noble giftcard I got about fifteen years ago. I feared that if I waited any longer, they might deduct from the $30 my benefactors put on it like they threatened to do on the back of the card. How did I spend it? Yesterday I went on to bn.com, and after about an hour, I was able to find a suitable Bible and Qur'an that combined were $27.54 (and came with free shipping since the order totaled more than $25--w00t!). I figure I can use these old holy books to do some study into religion and make myself better informed about what exactly all these fellows are thinking with their extremism and stuff. Who knows? I just might convert myself to some religion. ::Chuckle::
So anyways, after Best Buy, John and me were about on the verge of dying, and we were planning to just head on home until Eric encouraged us to try some ping pong at his place. Deciding that we could use the adrenaline boost, we accepted, and soon enough we were at Chez Eric. I will now recount the history of the nation of Pingpong, wrought with brutal civil wars and devious coups.
The nation was effectively formed when Cantay of Turk united the wandering and confused peoples of the region together under one banner and established trade routes and cultural links to the outside world. Over the next five centuries, the First Cantay Dynasty ruled Pingpong and the country flourished. However, a jealous general named Cody (Eric's brother) soon hatched a ploy to take power away from the Cantays by turning the army against him. After much vicious fighting within the royal palace, Cody's followers were able to claim the reigns of Pingpong from the recently decapitated King Cantay XVII.
Cody was unable to keep power for more than two centuries, though, falling quickly to an assault of the Eric Tribe after barely fending off the savage Johns. The leader of the Erics was then unable to maintain strength and unity in the kingdom, and Blondie III abdicated his throne to the cheers of millions who were demanding that the deposed Cantays be allowed to return to power. Cantay I of the Second (often referred to as the "Glorious") Cantay Dynasty (the numbers start over with each dynasty) instituted countless reforms throughout his kingdom, though many of them were created to help keep him and his descendants maintain power and were in reality quite oppressive. Of course, his tactics served to keep the family in control of Pingpong for seven hundred years--until Erics, promising freedom and love, forced themselves into power by convincing Cantay XXII that living at the family estate in Couch would be a much finer thing to do than to rule over a country. Cantay XXII, you see, was mentally retarded (hurrah for inbreeding!) and so it actually didn't take much convincing for this to happen--Cantay;s family even paid the Erics a monthly sum for their services.
After only two monarchs from the Erics succeeded to the throne, the people of Pingpong realized that these guys were at least as brutal as the Cantays before them, while not having the added advantage of being able to scare foreign leaders with a toothy grin. A civil war that broke out after the death of Erico II lasted only three weeks, and Cantay supporters quickly installed the best candidate into the position. Oddly enough, this fellow--the closest living and willing male relative of Cantay XXII's--was at best a fourth cousin to Cantayana, the matriarch of the family, and so the quality of service was mediocre as far as Cantays go. In fact, the Cantays were nearly destroyed two centuries after they began the Third Cantay Dynasty by Cantay V, who ate all of his children, then his wife, then his parents, then his cousins, and then anyone else that he could find of his family. The belief was that by eating everyone, he would grow stronger. In actuality it may have worked, since Cantay V lived to be 84 years old and reigned for 47 of them.
Into the vacuum the pesky Erics leaped and claimed power for three generations before Cantos the Young practically came out of no where to challenge Eric III for the throne. After about ten coups attempts and ten attempted rebuttal assassinations, Cantos finally came to power during the confusion caused when Eric III was strangled to death by his four year old son, who then proceeded to explode. Cantos, realizing the problems to the people posed by the Second and Third Cantay Dynasties, eased the restrictions that his forefathers had placed to protect him, and quickly became known as Cantos the W00t. He and his progeny expanded Pingpong and brought prosperity to the people over the next five hundred years, until tragedy struck the House of Cantay to end the Fourth (often termed "Most Glorious") Cantay Dynasty.
A large comet struck the royal palace of Pingpong, utterly slaughtering its inhabitants, and fulfilling the prediction made by the Erician seer Harpoo that "They will die! All of them!" which she made just before stabbing herself in the eye. Because she was so completely right, the Erics were allowed to snatch power, which they held for three centuries, establishing the first real non-Cantay dynasty, known as the Dynasty of Erics. However, it didn't last much beyond the reign of Shazhopper II, who accidently cut off the "DO NOT REMOVE UNDER PENALTY OF LAW" tag from his mattress, and was executed. The Fifth, and current Cantay Dynasty has been in power for three hundred years and shows no signs of letting up any time soon. Yay!
So... what does all this mean? It means I had winning streaks of 5, then 7, then 2, then 5, then 3 in ping pong at Eric's today. That may not sound extremely impressive, but take into account that after about ten games the body starts to get very angry. For those of you who weren't there, my overall record was 22-6, and only once did I suffer consecutive losses (see the only Eric Dynasty, where I lost the throne to Eric, then John lost, then I lost again). Individual records (estimated in the win-columns) are 2-1 against Cody, 6-0 against John, and 14-5 against Eric (as you may notice, John and Cody did lots of sitting out).
Anyways, now that I've driven you from this place forever, I would like to wish you a good night. Hasta la byebye, folk.
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